When it RAINS it Pours..........

Asalaam alaikum,

A lot as been going on since the last time I posted. Two friends recently gave birth. I’ve hit 20 weeks—whoo hoo for the half way point. And Amirah has started Montessori school. The latter has been the hardest for me. Pre-school starting, Amirah was all GUNG-HO about school. Always asking when she was going back to see the other children. Well now she is totally transitioned in and she is TRIPPIN. She’s always saying she DOESN’T want to go to school. She doesn’t want to go to BED at night. She’s fighting ME tooth and nail. WHAT happened? And you know. it hurts. It hurts to see her cry when I leave her with her grandparents who are dropping her off this weekend. No parent wants to see their child cry and scream that they don’t want to do something. Today when it happened I felt like a bad parent.

As you’re probably know I was swimming in a pool of doubt. Doubt about her being in ‘free school’. Doubts about being able to handle two children mostly buy my self. I even have doubts about my parenting skills and whether I’m a good enough parent. Would it have been better to wait to have had Amirah? Would it have been better to have a better job? Would it be better for all if we would have waited to have another child in our family right now? But in the end..Allah (swt) is azwajal, I’m basically here for the ride.


But as friend of mine always tells me, things could always be worst. Although when you’re going thru something, one always feels that NOTHING could be worse than what you’re going thru. I thank Allah(swt) for my smart and inquisitive child. I thank Allah (swt) for the growing kicker in my tummy. I thank Allah (swt) for the peace in my home and in my relationship with my husband. I thank Allah(swt) for the raining and the pouring. Ameen.

Ma salaama
Umm Amirah